La da da da da da La, Da Daaa,
La da da da, La da da da, La da da daaa
I was gonna blog a post until I got high
I was gonna post a Thursday Thirteen but then I got high
My T13 is gone and I know why (why man?) yea heyy,
–’cuz I got high
–’cuz I got high
–’cuz I got high
La da da da da, da, da da da
This is my brain
This is my brain on Cyclobenzaprine
Any questions?
Wait. What am I doing here? Oh, yeah. I’m supposed to be blogging. Here let me try this posting thingy again…
I went to the doctor yesterday because, for the last week and a half, I have had horrible flank pain on my left side. I thought, at first, that maybe I had pulled a muscle. Laundry is a dangerous chore, you know. But then, nothing truly relieved or lessened the pain. I tried ibuprofen, acetaminophen, and one day, I even broke down and took a Vicodin even though I usually barf them right back up. (I’m a narcotics wimp.)
Anyway, nothing helped so I decided that it was time to see the doctor. At this point, I figured that I was probably passing another kidney stone. Oh, the joy. And I was correct, sort of. The doc sent me for a CTscan and bloodwork. It turns out that I have not one, but two stones.
But the nice doctor prescribed some muscle relaxants for me to help ease the pain. Wasn’t that thoughtful of her? And now, here is me, all dopey doped up on Cyclobenzaprine. I swear, an hour passes in the blink of an eye and I still don’t know where I put my phone.
Ever Have One Of Those Conversations That Makes You Say, “Huh?”
But The Best You Can Do Is Just Shake Your Head And Walk Away.
Follow Along Now…
1.Barmaid: “Excuse me. Could you please ask your boyfriend to put the end of our pool table back down. He’s scaring the other customers.”
2.Me: “Um… huh? I don’t have a boyfriend.”
3.Barmaid: “That’s not what he says.”
4.Me: “He? …OMGawd that guy’s a monster!”
5.Barmaid: “Yeah. Exactly. Now, about that pool table.”
6.Me: “Look, lady, I have no freakin’ clue who that guy is. I’ve never seen him before in my life.”
7.Barmaid: “That’s not what he says. Apparently he’s upset that you dumped him. Look, I understand. I’d dump him too. But if he doesn’t put the pool table down soon, we’re going to call the cops on your boyfriend.”
8.Me: “Oh, for Pete’s sake! Fine. I’ll ask him to put it down. …but he’s NOT my boyfriend!”
9.Me: “Uh, hey there Big Guy. …What say you put that pool table down?”
10.Big Guy: “Okay. Sorry.”
11.Me: (???) “Thanks. Uh… bye.”
12.My Friends: “What the hell was that all about?”
13.Me: “Beats me.”
True story.
Thanks for stopping by! I hope you all have a terrific Thursday!
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link, (via Mr. Linky above), to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
5. Make love in the rain (preferably a warm, Summer rain)
6. Pilot/fly an airplane
7. Learn to dance the Tango
8. Revisit The Grand Canyon
9. Hug a lion
10. Sip Pina Colada’s while on a beach somewhere exotic, with nothing to do but breathe all day, until the big moon rises and it’s time to play…
“…Cause when the sun goes down, we’ll be groovin
When the sun goes down, we’ll be feelin all right
When the sun sinks down over the water
Everything gets hotter when the sun goes down…”
11. Dye my hair blonde, ‘cuz I’m worth it.
(WTFartbutters does that mean anyway? I’ve never dyed my hair before… does that mean I’m worthless?)
12. Scare the droppings out of an entire gaggle of geese
(Yes. I had a bad experience and paybacks are gonna be a… well, you know.)
13. Attend a costume ball
Thanks for stopping by! I hope you all have a terrific Thursday!
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link, (via Mr. Linky above), to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link, (via Mr. Linky above), to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
We have a full-house this week. It was *Transfer Day* on Monday. So now we have five kids, as opposed to two, which always makes things a bit more… interesting.
Around 3:30-ish the three little ones got home from school and came bursting through the door. I gave them all hugs, complimented Gloria on her new hairdo, and then set them each to task on their homework and chores.
While Erin sat at the kitchen table doing her math homework, I sorted and folded the clean socks. All the while, she chatted (at full speed) incessantly…
1.
E: “I can help you with the socks if you like? I know whose is whose and I can put them all together. I’m really good with matching socks. Can I help you?”
Me: “Thanks, but you need to concentrate on your homework right now. Let’s get that done first.”
2.
E: [pointed to several of the socks] “This one, as you know, is always mine because it’s blue. And this one is Jon’s. …and this one is Manda’s. …and this one—-”
Me: “Um, yeah. I’ve got it covered. Thanks.” [I pointed back to her paper] “Math. Finish. Now.”
3.
E: [grinned, then looked down at her paper] “Hmmm. Can you think of anything else that can be multiplied by 3, then add 2 that equals 10 or less? I have to think of four numbers and I only have three. And then I have to put the answers on this graph below.”
Me: [I looked at her paper] “Um, no, actually. It looks like you’ve got it covered. There are only 3 combinations.”
4.
E: “Then how am I supposed to finish the graph?”
Me: “Well… you can either extend it to go beyond the #10, or you can simply put your three answers down and let your teacher know that four does not compute.”
5.
CJ: [my resident genius piping up in the background] “There are only three combinations.”
6.
Me: “Thank you, CJ. We’ve figured that out.”
7.
Jon: [while putting away the clean dishes, decided to sing...]
8.
Yankee Doodle came to town
A-ridin’ on a rocket
Stuck a feather up his butt
And thought that it was chocolate…
9.
[everyone chuckled, myself included]
10.
CJ: [decided to gift us with a ditty of his own...]
11.
Popeye the sailor man
Lived in a garbage can
Toot-toot!
Turned up the gas
Blew up his ass
Popeye the sailor man
Toot toot!
12.
Jon: [laughed hysterically] E: [giggled quietly] Me: [managed to suppress my chuckle under a grin]
13.
Me: “Uhhh… very funny. Now, kindly refrain from using profanity. Thank you.”
Yeesh. Kids.
That was only 3 out of 5 of ‘em. The other two were in their room, playing ever so quietly. Hmmm, I wonder what they were really up to?
Thanks for stopping by! I hope you all have a terrific Thursday!
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link, (via Mr. Linky above), to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
1. I’m setting out lint traps tonight. I think about a half dozen should do the trick. I’m gonna catch those rascally sock thieves once and for all!
2. I have a girlfriend that, even though we only chat about once a year, has remained one of my very best friends. We’ve been friends for 21 years, and when we ring each other up, it’s as though we chatted just yesterday.
We used to hang out together all the time. We worked together, she called me daily, and every-single weekend she invited me over to her house for dinner and an exciting game of Spades. (Her husband always made things lively.) [sigh] Those were the times.
But then life happened and we saw less and less of each other, but we’ve never lost contact. The love, trust, and loyalty remains ever present. We may not always agree with one another’s opinion or ideas, but the friendship never falters.
Why can’t all of my friends be like that?
3. I loaded my dishwasher this afternoon, only to discover that it’s busted, again.
I tried to fix it like my hubby does, because he’s not here this week. I removed about six screws, pulled off the face/front, and then wiggled the wires.
It didn’t work.
Guess I don’t have his magic tool-time touch.
What did I just say?
4. Home schooling my 13 yr. old obsessive-compulsive son is a lesson in patience.
I’m currently failing that lesson.
Miserably.
I need drugs.
But I suppose Heineken will do.
5. Oh, don’t get me wrong. I enjoy home schooling my kids.
But in the process, I’m edging towards insanity.
‘Course, some would argue that I’ve already been there and forgot to come back.
Maybe that’s not such a bad thing.
But if that Mad Hatter shows up, I’m gonna pop ‘em.
There can be only one.
[heh]
Did anybody catch that?
6. My dog needs a bath.
7. I sort of had a brain fart ’round about the holidays. It didn’t occur to me that my children no longer needed to gift their teachers with my mouth-watering fudge.
Now, this 12 lbs of ‘gift’ fudge that was supposed to go to their teachers… is.
13. One of these days, in the middle of being a wife, mother, teacher, eBay auctioneer, blogger, and writer, I’m actually going to finish the novel I’ve been working on. That will feel so fantastic, I think I’ll pop the cork on a bottle of bubbly.
And I just may drink it too.
Thanks for stopping by! I hope you all have a terrific Thursday!
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link, (via Mr. Linky above), to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
13 Songs I Like To Get Silly With (Alternatively Titled: 13 Songs That Elicit Shared Giggles And Goofy Choreography Between My 12 yr. Old Daughter And Me.)
Before we delve into my musical list here, I just have to say… OMGawd! Twisted Sister sang “O’ Come All Ye Faithful” on Jay Leno last night. I don’t think I’ll ever be able to wash that frightening image from my brain. That’s just wrong, folks. So wrong. It was like watching the love child of Tammy Faye Baker and Dr. Frank-N-Furter, complete with holiday inspired, frosty-blue eyeshadow.
Let’s not do the Time Warp again.
[shudder]
I feel so… violated. That song will never be the same for me again. I think I’m going to cry.
[deep breath]
Please, go on ahead of me. I need a stiff drink and a lobotomy.
First up on my list is…
1.I Hate Everything About You by Ugly Kid Joe
[heh]
Is it wrong that this song makes me happy?
2.Call Me Up In Dreamland by Van Morrison
Oh, now this is a fun one to dance to. Yup. We used this one for a bout of morning aerobics Wednesday morning. My daughter and I had fun bopping from the living-room to the kitchen and back again, and again, and again.
My son scowled, shook his head at us, and then put his headphones on and turned his back to us. Poor kid. He needs to learn how to lighten up. Yeesh.
3.Pink Shoe Laces by Dodi Stevens
One day, about twenty years ago, I was in my basement, wearing a feather boa and doing a little dance number, while belting this song out with gusto.
I thought I was alone.
I NEVER would have allowed anyone to catch me doing something so… utterly… juvenile.
[sigh]
In the middle of the song, I twirled around and stopped dead in my tracks. My mom had left the door unlocked when she left the house earlier; and one of my co-workers let himself in after no one answered his knock at the door. I have no idea how long he had been sitting on my basement stairs watching me. But the grin on his face when I spotted him was telling enough.
I was left with no choice but to grin back …sheepishly.
4.Suga Suga by Baby Beesh
This one has a fun, rhythmic beat. Nuff said.
5.Dancing With Myself by Billy Idol
I love me some Billy Idol.
6.1985 by Bowling For Soup
Yeah. You know these guys rock.
And I’m not just saying that ‘cuz I rocked out to Wham.
[snicker]
7.Almost by Bowling For Soup
Bwahahahahahahahahahahaha! Now that’s funny!
8.Kung Foo Fighting by Bustop (Carl Douglas)
Love it!
Oh shut up!
9.I Can Dream About You by Dan Hartman
I can dream about you
If I can’t hold you tonight
Oooh, I can dream about you
Oooh, I can dream..
I’m such a dreamer.
10.Inside Out by Eve6
This is a head-bobbing fun song with absolutely brilliant lyrics. See for yourself…
Chorus:
I would swallow my pride
I would choke on the rinds
But the lack thereof would leave me empty inside
I would swallow my doubt turn it inside out find nothing but faith in nothing
Want to put my tender heart in a blender
Watch it spin around to a beautiful oblivion
Rendezvous then I’m through with you
Yeah. Love it!
11.Holiday by Green Day
Okay, so if you could see me head-bopping and dancing wildly around my living-room in step with this tune… Well, you’d probably think I had epilepsy.
So I’m gonna make sure my door is locked this time.
[heh]
12.Struggle by Ringside
Another bit of head-bobbing fun!
13.What I Like About You by the Romantics
Love it! Love it! Love it!
Well fiddle. I have a gazillion other songs I’d love to share with you, but I’m supposed to stop at 13. So I guess that’s it.
Thanks for stopping by! I hope you all have a terrific Thursday!
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link, (via Mr. Linky above), to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
1. What if Billy Idol and I hooked up… would he rock my world?
“Betcha!”
2. What if Skittles really were made from rainbows… would that make the leprechaun’s pot o’ gold nothing but a bunch of blarney?
“Perish the thought!”
3. What if Mister Dyckerson was really a shy, sweet, and incredibly romantic adonis who loved little children and cried during chick flicks… would he create an alter rapscallion-blog-ego that pooned his roommate’s girl, does freaky things with pork rinds, and, (as a child), had barricaded himself in his room so that he could construct replicas of popular ’80′s’ game show sets?
5. What if the moon really was made out of cheese… would you visit the man-in-the-moon without bringing a bottle of Febreez?
6. What if Mikey didn’t like it… would people still choose Life?
7. What if, in 1859, Darwin had published “The Origin of the Spam”, in which his theory suggested that all life form evolved from pig intestines … would you believe it?
8. What if I got to #8 of my T13 and couldn’t think of any more “What If’s”… would you feel cheated?
9. What if Christmas was in July… would we put our gifts under a slip-n-slide?
10. What if I repeatedly bashed my TV with a baseball bat while screaming, “Aaarrrggghhh! Get this no-talent twit off of the screen!!!” during a Direct TV commercial break featuring Jessica Simpson as Daisy Duke… would you completely understand my disgust-filled rage?
(Just sharing the misery, folks.)
11. What if I sang out of tune… would you stand up and walk out on me?
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link, (via Mr. Linky above), to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
13 Things You May Hear Stacy Say While She’s Driving
1. When the other driver on the road doesn’t bother to use their blinker:
“Nice blinkers there pal. I can’t even begin to express my gratitude.”
2. “Thanks for the warning, butt-face!”
3. Red stoplights (in the neighboring Capital city) when I’m on a schedule:
[groaning] “Why is it that I must hit every single red-light in this town today? I mean, it’s not like I have an appointment or anything.”
4. Impatience with slow drivers:
“Could you possibly go any blasted slower? Yeah, okay, so apparently you can. Swell.”
5. “It’s called a green light and it means GO!”
6. “It’s called a gas pedal and you’re supposed to STEP ON IT!”
7. Sitting behind another car at a fast-food drive-thru a bit tooooo long:
“Yeesh. What’d they do, order everything on freakin’ menu?”
8. Have you ever been driving along, minding the rules of the road, one of which is that you drive with traffic, not against it… and along comes a sweet, little, ol’ elderly person about to play Chicken with your headlights because they have no freakin’ clue where the heck they are, or that they happen to be driving on the wrong side of the road? Yeah. I’m telling ya. It has happened to me on three occasions now. Don’t they give these people driving tests?
“Excuse me, Grandma/Grandpa, but this happens to be my lane and I’m currently IN IT!”
9. “Wrong-way, Flannigan! Abort! Abort!”
(Yeah, I know. Someday I’ll be going the wrong way.)
10. Or how about this scenario: You’re sitting at a red-light, waiting patiently for it to turn green, when all of a sudden you look up into your rear-view mirror…
“Oh. Shit. Please don’t hit me in the ass. No-no-no-no-no… Whew!”
11. Now we move along to those annoying highway drivers that seem to find a particular interest in my rear bumper.
“Oh, you sooooo don’t want to go there. Pass or get off my ass, thank you.”
12. This one has to do with those archaic two-lane roads and 30-mph farm equipment. If you don’t know what I’m talking about, consider yourself blessed.
“Ha! This is me FINALLY passing your slow arse. Have a nice day!”
13. The coup de grace. I live in a small bit of nowhere. The population does not warrant the traffic that I always happen to run into. Every time I want to cross the freakin’ street (from our one and only fast-food joint to the gas station across the way), I end up waiting and waiting on a stream of cars coming from both directions. Yes. I said THE street. There is only one street that runs through town, and then one that crosses it and brings you into the subdivisions and whatnot. Anyhow, this strange phenomenon of excessive traffic in Mayberry causes me to bemoan:
“WTH? It’s not like we live in a freakin’ metropolis. There is nothing in this town… ab-so-freakin-lutely nuh-thang! So where the heck does all of this traffic come from!?! Am I in a Twighlight Zone episode? Aaauuuggghhh! I want out, I tell ya! Out!”
Thanks for stopping by! I hope you all have a terrific Thursday!
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link, (via Mr. Linky above), to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
“In music the passions enjoy themselves.” —Nietzsche 1886
“What passion cannot music raise and quell!” —John Dryden
1. Mouth
by Merril Bainbridge
“…When I kiss your mouth I want to taste it
Turn you upside down don’t wanna waste it…”
2. Dancing in the Moonlight
by Van Morrison
3. Leave Me Breathless
by The Corrs
4. Can You Take It
by John Mellencamp
5. Fuck You Like An Animal
by Nine Inch Nails
6. Sway
by Michael Buble
7. Addicted
by Enrique Iglesias
8. Tasty Love
by Freddie Jackson
9. Wicked Game
by Chirs Issak
10. Between The Sheets
by The Isley Brothers
11. Shake You Down
by Gregory Abbott
12. Hot Love
by Aldo Nova
13. Love You Til The End
by The Pogues
“…I just want to be there
When we’re caught in the rain
I just want to see you laugh not cry
I just want to feel you
When the night puts on its cloak
I’m lost for words don’t tell me
All I can say
I love you ’till the end…”
“Music, once admitted to the soul, becomes a sort of spirit, and never dies.”
~Edward George Bulwer-Lytton
Of course, this song list is subject to change as new music finds my ears…
Thanks for stopping by! I hope you all have a terrific Thursday!
The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link, (via Mr. Linky above), to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted! View More Thursday Thirteen Participants
